“Oh Rio, Rio by the sea-o, got to get to Rio and we’ve got to make time!”

Rio got a thrill today as Beyonce showed off her abs first thing this morning, gleefully lifting up her shirt for her frenzied fans below. It was nice of her to bless us all with her delightfully toned belly and all, but what’s with those ridiculous bloomers she’s got going on? They look like polka-dotted Huggies. She just needs some big ears, and she’d be a dead ringer for Minnie Mouse. I’m pretty sure her mother Solange is responsible for those. Jeez…that woman has about as much talent at designing clothes as Sarah Palin has at playing the flute.